Friends and family often tell me, “you could sell ice to an Eskimo!” Typically this expression isn’t considered a positive one, yet when my friends and family say it to me, they say it with a twinkle in their eye and a smile. it used to bother me until I realized I would never sell ice to an Eskimo – not unless their heart leaped and their eyes said, “I only wish that ice was mine.”
In fact, I realized that is why I am so successful at selling. I don’t “sell.” Instead I listen for what people really want and I ask them what is stopping them from having what they really want.
For most people, the discussion has nothing to do with material possessions. What people really want is love, connection, freedom of mind – things like that! I hear what they want and I see that their desire is right there – like ice for an Eskimo – they already have it.
Suddenly I am not selling at all but just pointing out the obvious – so if you want that, and it is right here, why don’t you have it?
I think this is a seriously legitimate question. I genuinely don’t see why people stop themselves when they know what they want and it is right their for them.
This happened the other day with a client who called and described a program she imagined doing with me. I said, “I have a program exactly as you describe – it is my apprenticeship program.” We proceeded to talk about the program, her heart lit up, her hope and sense of adventure came alive, “That is exactly what I want to do.” When she found out the price ($25,000), she said, “I can’t do that!” She thought of all the reasons she couldn’t do that. I didn’t stop her. After all, these might be real problems she would have to resolve if she wanted to do the apprenticeship. Instead, I said, “I know exactly what you mean. I paid over $70,000 dollars to train with three principles people all over the world. I get it.”
Not only did I understand – I also saw that she knew what she wanted and she was feeling fear about the part she didn’t know anything about – money. Toward the end of our talk, I encouraged her to consider that she knew what she wanted – a three principles business – so where she put her attention now would be really important. No matter where she signed up (with me or another), I said, “Your heart is speaking to you right now. Look around. Think about what you are willing to do. Consider that you know what you want, so now the question is, “What Can I DO FOR IT?”
It’s tempting — and all too easy — to tell yourself, “I can’t, I can’t, I don’t know how, I don’t know what to do, I’m scared.” But in the end, when you die, you won’t be able to go back and change your mind. Your decision now to focus on what you want to create and look for as many ways as you can to create it – that is something you will NEVER REGRET!
Are you wondering what happened with that woman who called me? We had three conversations exploring her vision for herself. Each time she faced her fear of money I listened. I saw that she had a habit of scaring herself out of her dreams. I asked her about it. She explained her logic and while doing so – realized it wasn’t so helpful. By the end of the third conversation we both knew we were in the right place. Our work together has already begun and my apprenticeship spots are SOLD OUT!
My advice to you? Create what you want. Put your whole energy, your whole attention on what you want. When you need breaks – take them. If you start feeling a bit insecure – slow down, feel and be okay with yourself. The whole point is, YOU DON’T KNOW what is going to happen and you don’t want to die wondering what could have been. Not knowing doesn’t mean you have to be scared. It just means you don’t know.
I am not a sales woman. I am a woman who sees dreams and says, “YES.” What else is there really to do?
PS. Does your yes lead to Costa Rica? Revive Your Sanity this August at retreat center Blue Osa. Garden to Table Food, Sustainable cottages, Yoga, Hikes and Three Principles conversations with a small group. YUMMY!!!